A, Palm/Passion- Isaiah 50:4–9a "That Sinking Feeling"

We’ve all experienced that terrible sinking feeling somewhere and at some time in our lives. 

It may have been only for the briefest of moments.  It may have lasted for a considerable amount of time.  That terrible sinking feeling may have occurred in public before many people; it could have happened when you were alone or with one other person.  You might be feeling it right now!  In any situation, this feeling gives a sense of ugliness, feeling dis-easy, your skin and mood descends into clamminess and coldness.

Impending doom, loss of control, something gone horribly wrong gives one this feeling.  The moment before impact, the moment after the doctor gives the diagnosis, so much pain you think you’re going to die, so much pain you worry you’re not going to die, watching someone suffering.  Am I God forsaken?  Are we forsaken!  That sinking feeling.

The pain of grief and loss, tears so bitter they hurt.  The loneliness after the loss, that sinking feeling.

Being caught out, publicly humiliated, guilty facing your accuser, that sinking feeling.

The calm suddenly becomes chaos, conflict with others, anger, confrontation, harsh words spoken, accusations flying, going past the point of no return, regret, that terrible sinking feeling.

The injustice of the situation, falsely accused, no one believes the truth, helplessly unable to stop the inevitable, depression, anxiety, despair, hopelessness, that sinking feeling.

Promises broken, expectations shattered, the height of joyful excitement stopped with fright and fear, desire unfulfilled, frustration, that sinking feeling.

We’ve all experienced that terrible sinking feeling somewhere and at some time in our lives.  All these contributors, from whatever it was, that’s caused that terrible sinking feeling, is a sense of death that causes the fight or flight instinct to kick in. 

When that sinking feeling occurs, do you run to God or run away from him?  Do you struggle with God, or do you give up on him?  Do you seek a knowledge of good and evil, or a knowledge of Jesus Christ, trusting in yourself, or trusting in what Jesus promises in his Word?  When that terrible sinking feeling of death touches you, how do you respond?

Feelings were running high when Jesus rode into Jerusalem on a donkey.  But the tone changed, the crowd turned, victorious excitement turned into vicious incitement.  Sunday saw Jesus ride into Jerusalem in majesty, not to overthrow the Romans as expected, but to overturn the tables of the traders in the temple. 

The Jewish leaders felt fury when Jesus taught crowds, while confronting, confounding, and silencing them with the very words in which they sought to trap him.

The feelings of the disciples were sorely tested, when Jesus told them the temple would be torn down, and the coming of the kingdom of heaven will be proceeded by chaos and tribulation.  Judas feeling his way as he betrayed Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane, feelings running so deep one of the captor’s ears is cut off.

That sinking feeling was present everywhere, in so many ways!  The disciples scatter, Judas regrets what he does, he changes his mind, he loses his mind, he hangs himself.  Peter too promises much, but three times fails, outside he wept so bitterly. That sinking feeling was everywhere!

The rage of the chief priests and the elders,  Pilate’s wife sends word, “have nothing to do with this man”, the crowd cries, “crucify him”, Pilate feels trapped, that sinking feeling.  He washes his hands, injustice, and Barabbas is released.  The women of Galilee watch on from a distance, they see the unfairness, they see the wrong.  O can anyone stop that sinking feeling?

See him nailed to the cross.  Six hours of suffering till he cries out, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?”  He breathes his last, he hangs his head, it is finished!

Much happened in Holy Week!  High emotion, feelings flying to-and-fro!  Just like us when we have those negative sinking feelings, so too did those in Jerusalem.

These feelings led folk to fight or flee.  Even once Jesus was dead and the graves opened, and the dead came out of their tombs, and when the soldier realised Jesus was the Son of God.  That sinking feeling! 

When the temple curtain tore from top to bottom, and the Jews suspected Jesus would be stolen from the tomb, placing a guard to protect their image, rather than protect the glory of God.  That sinking feeling.

These sinking feelings are all feelings of death.  Everyone was feeling a sense of death.  People scrambling left, right, and centre, to preserve their position, their ideals, their futures, their advantage from death.  When that sinking feeling of death approached, everyone sought to protect their knowledge of good and evil!

What was Jesus feeling during Holy Week when the crowds joyously welcomed him on a donkey?  When he taught and tested in the temple?  What was Jesus feeling when he celebrated his last supper, sharing his bread with Judas Iscariot, who would betray him, and not be around to see his resurrection, believe and receive forgiveness?  With Peter, who was promising so much but would deny him, not just once, but three times?

Of Jesus we hear in Isaiah, “The Lord GOD has given me the tongue of those who are taught, that I may know how to sustain with a word him who is weary. Morning by morning he awakens; he awakens my ear to hear as those who are taught.  The Lord GOD has opened my ear, and I was not rebellious; I turned not backward.  I gave my back to those who strike, and my cheeks to those who pull out the beard; I hid not my face from disgrace and spitting.  But the Lord GOD helps me; therefore I have not been disgraced; therefore I have set my face like a flint, and I know that I shall not be put to shame.  He who vindicates me is near. Who will contend with me? Let us stand up together. Who is my adversary? Let him come near to me.  Behold, the Lord GOD helps me; who will declare me guilty?”  (Isaiah 50:4–9a ESV)

Jesus was sent into this sinking world with our sinking feelings of death.  The stink of death was constantly before him.  Unlike us, he never put it aside, tried to forget about it, while secretly worrying about it.  He never fought or fled from the situation before him, even when everyone else did. 

Jesus felt that sinking feeling.  He wept over death, he lamented over Jerusalem, he suffered under sin.  He became estranged from his Father, abandoned on the cross.  Yes, Jesus felt that sinking feeling, your sinking feeling that gives you a taste of death, and died for you.  Your sinking feeling led him to sink into death, for you to feel forgiveness, receive forgiveness, hear, and taste forgiveness, so you  believe his forgiveness!

When you were baptised into Jesus’ death and resurrection, he was baptised into your terrible sinking feelings of death!  Jesus was baptised into your guilt, your conflict with your work colleagues, your estranged family, your shame and embarrassment, your failures, the unfairness you bear, the prejudices you produce, the injustice you induce. All that causes that sinking feeling in you, Jesus was born into, was baptised into, die for, and has risen over.

When he was incarnated in Mary, he saw your mess.  When he rode into Jerusalem, he carried all your cares.  When he healed, he took on your illnesses.  When he confronted the proud and arrogant, he called out your vanity and selfish ways.  When tempted by the devil with sinking feelings, know he overcame your temptation before the devil.  Know, when the Holy Spirit allows a sense of death, in that sinking feeling, he is leading you from death to life in Jesus Christ!

Whatever it is, causing that sinking feeling of death, fall into the arms of Jesus.  Let Jesus carry you to the cross.  He is the only one who can carry us through death and into life as it should be. 

When that sinking feeling is forced upon you, at the moment you realise your good and evil is incapacitated by death, let Jesus Christ love you with his flint-like face!  Let his good over evil be your only good!  Let your death be his death!  Let his victory be your victory! Amen.